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Symptoms of sinusitis can include nasal congestion, a thick, yellow, or greenish discharge from the nose or down the back of the throat, pain, tenderness, swelling, and pressure around the eyes, cheeks, nose, or forehead, reduced sense of smell and taste, cough, and fever

Chronic Constipation and Diarrhea Slowed-down peristalsis due to the nicotine effect on smooth muscle cells found within walls of the intestines may lead to prolonged transit time, hence chronic constipation while increased activity can cause rapid passing of food leading to watery stools thus diarrhea

(Okay, hopefully pretending.) At one point, there were even taglines promising more "satisfaction," whatever that meant